By: Terry Allen
Big Mama always said, “You can’t heal what you won’t face.” And Lord knows, that message couldn’t hit harder than it does right now. We are living in a time where personal trauma meets public turmoil — from the PTSD we carry in our souls to the fear that’s creeping into our communities through the latest I.C.E. raids and unconstitutional actions being taken by leadership.
These aren’t just policy problems — they are people problems. They shake families, break spirits, and reopen generational wounds we’ve never had time to fully bandage. But as our brother Carlton reminded us, we are more than our badness — we are our greatness when we engage the pain and move toward healing.
We’ve been taught to tough it out, to grind through, but rarely to pause long enough to feel, to reflect, and to rebuild. Big Mama would’ve said healing doesn’t mean pretending the pain isn’t real — it means refusing to let it rule you. She knew grace wasn’t about being perfect; it was about being present — being aware that God doesn’t waste pain, He repurposes it.
Our baggage is the unresolved weight of our past — the fear, the trauma, and the lies we tell ourselves just to survive. Our luggage, though, is what we carry once healing has taken root — wisdom, resilience, and the readiness to move forward.
Baggage holds us back; luggage helps us move forward.
And Philippians 3:13 tells us, “Forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before.” That’s not denial — that’s direction.
If our nation is to heal, we have to do what Big Mama did at her kitchen table: tell the truth, name the pain, and turn it into power. Because history isn’t something that happened — it’s something we’re still writing.
Our healing is our protest. Our faith is our freedom.
And Big Mama said, “Don’t just survive this season — sanctify it.”
— Lucille “Big Mama” Allen was a community matriarch whose wisdom guided generations with faith, food, and fierce love. Her lessons live on in every story told around a table that feeds both body and soul.
Written by Terry Allen, Vice President of Focus Communications and Founder of 1016 Media. “Big Mama Said” is a column dedicated to preserving the wisdom and spiritual legacy of Lucille “Big Mama” Allen while applying her timeless lessons to today’s struggles and triumphs.
Terry Allen is an NABJ award-winning Journalist, DEI expert, PR professional, and founder of the charity – Vice President at Focus-PR, Founder of City Men Cook, and Dallas Chapter President of NBPRS.org
